Does it ever scare you how distorted modern music makes relationships sound? That all men are selfish pigs. That all girls are simply put upon and used. That romance means a quick tumble in the backseat. That love means a pretty girl and a hot guy. I find it hard to listen to the radio these days (for many reasons), but chiefly because the lyrics depress me. And they disguise their subversive message in upbeat, happy tunes - like "Sit Still, Look Pretty". A fun tune to listen to . . . but the lyrics?
You get off on your 9 to 5
Dream of picket
fences and trophy wives
But no, I'm
never gonna be 'cause I don't wanna be
No, I don't
wanna sit still look pretty
The refrain makes a marriage sound like a death sentence for the women. That their sole purpose is to make their husbands look good. And the subliminal message, at least to me? Women who choose to stay at home and care for their families with their picket fences are being used and essentially suffering from some kind of Stockholm syndrome.
That Snow White
She did right
In her life
Had 7 men to do
the chores
'Cause that's
not what a lady's for
And then this! As if women somehow feel entitled to have a man do EVERYTHING for them while they sit around ruling the world and doing whatever they want. How have we lost the understanding that responsibility and a shared partnership in marriage is what it's really about? That marriage isn't simply "the only thing a boy's gonna give a girl for free's captivity" . . . but that it's a beautiful example of self-sacrifice? Or at least it's supposed to be.
I'm never gonna be that
girl
Who's living in a Barbie world
. . . . .
This queen don't need a king
. . . . .
But this gal right here's gonna rule the world
Now, I understand that not every girl is as girly as I am . . . that we have different personalities and likes and dislikes etc. And granted, Barbie definitely gave a skewed view of the world as well. But not needing a king? That's simply not true. And I'm not advocating that every woman needs to get married. Absolutely not. There are definitely women who are called to the religious life or to the single life. But in that case? Their king is God alone. And in a marriage? The relationship between the husband and wife is meant to mirror that between Christ and the Church. Wives are called to submit to their husbands - not to rule the world. I mean, have you met women? We're awesome at organization and love and brainstorming . . . but we also tend to think with our hearts first, which could have disastrous effects on a nationwide level. Because in business and economics and politics, logic should come first. Even if it feels awful. And men are just better at that in general . . . at least, they used to be before society emphasized being in tune with their emotions so much that we wound up with a bunch of boys who can't handle adult responsibility. And then women swooped in to take over and fix things. And we've got the mess we have today. And yes, I'm aware there's a lot more nuance to that story . . . but that's the topic for another day.
So what's the bottom line? Other than the fact that these lyrics and all others like them really piss me off? Marriage is a partnership. It's a union of self-sacrifice and giving for the other. It's helping each other get to Heaven. It's not a phenomenon where the woman is constantly downtrodden and used as an object. And it's not a situation where the man is constantly overruled by the woman and made to feel inferior and incompetent. It's a union where the two become one and they use their individual skills and abilities and gifts together to create a firm foundation and a solid example for their children and the world. At least that's my two cents on the matter.