Music Makes My Heart Sing

Music awakens a sense of freedom and creativity within us.  It puts into wordless phrases the emotions of our heart.  Through music we can express the feelings and thoughts which we cannot explain with mere words.  The wide spectrum of musical genres encompasses the entire emotional psyche of human nature.  We find songs that help us through the tough times or buoy up our spirits when we are feeling down.  A few minutes of happy, upbeat music can brighten our day or boost the excitement already beginning.  Music strums the strings of our souls and draws forth the desire for the good and the beautiful.

Since we all enjoy music - whether it be classical, rock, country, hip hop, or any of a myriad of options - I believe it is important to be able to understand it at least a bit.  The ability to create music oneself nurtures a deeper appreciation for what is truly good and beautiful in the musical world.  A child who is exposed to the classical works will develop a greater understanding of talent and beauty.  (Not to knock all other types of music.  I love my pop and country and oldies.  But nothing quite makes my heart soar the way a beautiful orchestra does.)  One of the greatest methods of exposure to music is a total immersion, i.e. learning about it for oneself.  Whether your child joins the church choir or learns to play another instrument, the concentration, dedication and artistic endeavors that accompany such instruction is a wonderful addition to a child's raising.  

Most children don't really want to play an instrument, but a few years of elementary piano or violin teaches them important lessons such as hand-eye coordination, a good ear, and obedience. ;)  Besides, the ability to read music is always a good skill to have.  Choosing the right instrument can be difficult because of the numerous choices: woodwinds; percussion; string instruments.  Most people fall back on the piano or the violin, or even voice lessons.  These are all wonderful options (I play the piano myself.)  But if your child shows interest in a different instrument, please let them pursue it.  Their desire to play music will increase if they can play something they enjoy.  

I am eternally grateful for the piano lessons and encouragement from my parents.  Whenever I get a chance, I slide my fingers across the ivory and ebony keys as I revel in the musical beauty of pure notes. I also love singing, and I thank my parents for forcing me to join the choir at a young age.  I did not want to join, but my parents knew best, and I have developed a deep love for singing.  Every time I hear a beautiful polyphony or an acapella choir, my heart glows warm as I listen to the beauty reflecting God's glory.  So don't despair if your child kicks and screams when you drag them to music lessons.  They should one day appreciate the wonderful exposure to good music.  If not, you will at least have tried, and that is all one can ask of a loving parent.  :)

Moments of Beauty

Each day contains innumerable occasions for lessons and surprises, especially in a house with growing children.  It is the little moments that make life worthwhile, yet too often we get carried away with the stress and worry of checking off everything on our "To Do" list.  When we focus on simply getting things done, we miss out on golden opportunities to observe, discover, learn and experience so many wonderful things.  I struggle (and have for many years) with knowing when to be firm with the schedule and when to let things slide a bit so as to enjoy life.  I have always wanted to have a plan, and a solid one at that.  Over the past few years, I have lessened my grip on controlling every aspect of my life.  (College helped a lot with that.)  Now, in my work with children, I am discovering more and more that life is full of surprises and unexpected changes in plan.  Thankfully, rather than spiraling because my carefully-laid plans have changed (slightly or drastically), I focus (most of the time) on the unexpected happiness or silver lining to be found within the unforeseen alterations.  A few examples from today may suffice for explanation.

While going through the schoolwork with one child, I was explaining verbs from the English book.  We were only supposed to complete one lesson (which I would have been perfectly content to do), but the child was driven by some force or other to continue on and complete above and beyond the work required for today's lesson.  While I was a bit surprised (since schooling is generally a "get it done and over with" type of activity), I was genuinely pleased to see such a keen interest in the child.  She flew through the exercises, and I glimpsed a thirst for knowledge that struck me very hard.  While she may not have understood completely why she wanted to do more work, I know that it stems (at least partially) from that innate thirst within us all to know the truth and to learn all we can so as to draw closer to our Creator.  If only that thirst would burst forth when we were studying math. ;)  Taking this instance, however, we can first understand our desire for knowledge, and then we may begin to call it forth as a means of encouragement and persuasion when faced with a task undesirable.  In my case, these disagreeable tasks mainly revolve around teaching/learning math and studying for exams (which are done for the time being).  Yet I understand the importance of learning and receiving a well-balanced education; therefore, I strive harder to pursue equally well that which I enjoy and that which I must do.  No person likes everything they must do, yet they should do it anyways.  A child who hates math must still learn the concepts because they are essential to their education.  In life, there are things we must do, whether it is studying in school, working through a drudge job, or (most importantly) sacrificing our own selfish wants and desires for the path of God.  I have found, through my experience, that it becomes easier to accomplish an undesired task when you remember the real reason behind whatever it is.  Basically, when we remember that God is in control and that all of our actions should be for His glory, we can better offer up our own sufferings for the good of others.

Not all learning experiences are difficult or painful.  Today I witnessed the true joy of "practice makes perfect" as a little one-year-old girl walked (or stumbled) about the room.  Whenever she fell down, she got back up again.  Now that she knows the joy of walking, crawling is a lesser option.  She would rather struggle to remain on two feet rather than crawl about on her hands and knees.  The happiness that glows in her face from this accomplishment is a beautiful sight.  As she toddles around, I reflect on that joy and recollect that we should approach all of our lessons with the same attitude.  The more one must work for an end, the more fulfilling the success becomes.  If only we remembered this when faced with a tough exam or a problem at work, perhaps we could become better people and create a happier world.  So treasure the lessons to be learned each day, and do not cast aside those taught by even the smallest of children.  For in God's eyes, we are all His children.  If we can regain the innocence and trust of a little child, we can accomplish anything through God Who strengthens us.

A Homemade Christmas

As we approach the end of the 12 days of Christmas, I want to share a few of my family memories with you all before I resume my normal postings.  While I was home for Christmas, I realized how truly blessed I am to have grown up in my family.  Our traditions and quirks become more treasured with each passing year.  From the cookies baked each season (this year with many wheat substitutes) to the Christmas tree and guessing presents, each moment shimmers in my mind with a warm glow.

Anna's Christmas dress.

This year was an especially homemade Christmas since several of us wore homemade dresses.  My brilliant mother sewed three separate and gorgeous dresses for my younger sisters, and I made my own dress when I got home.  These dresses were adventures from the start since each one involved various alterations to the pattern.  My mom and sister put a lot of time and thought into devising sleeves for my dress, and I was so proud of my mother's perseverance and ingenuity while she was sewing the girls' dresses.  I believe that every young girl should learn how to sew.  It teaches patience and instills a "try, try again" mentality (if you make sure that your daughter does not despair when the fabric puckers or the needle breaks.)  This sewing should definitely include a well-rounded knowledge of hand stitching, machine stitching, and the art of ironing.  So when your pants need to be hemmed or alterations need to be made to a formal dress, you won't need to pay top dollar for a professional job.  You will be able to "skip the money step" and fix it yourself with a little time and patience.  If you put your mind to it, there's no telling what you may achieve.  As a note of encouragement, here is a picture of one of the dresses my mother made for Christmas this year.


I'll post a few more pictures of our sewing accomplishments once I find the photos.  :)

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you all!  

(And I promise to write regularly once more.)

O Christmas Tree

Our family tradition is to go out in the bitter cold, search through the entire tree farm, and finally select the perfect tree and cut it down ourselves.  I love the smell of pine needles and the warm glow of lights against the green boughs.  The myriad of ornaments sparkle gently amid the twinkling lights, reflecting the diversity and memories of Christmases gone by.  Each year we add another ornament to our collection, so that now each of us children has our own box of keepsake ornaments.  As we lovingly hang the delicate bulbs and memorable baubles, I recall the family memories tied in to each treasured keepsake.  Working together, we create a Christmas tree that reflects both our individuality and our unity as a family.

This year was no different than years past.  We drove out in the morning with our trailer and braved the snowless cold (yet warmer than previous years) to discover the perfect tree.  This is a long and detailed process which involves analyzing every single potential tree.  

This tree was too tall, but my musical sisters decided it was a conductor.

We found several trees just the right height –– for my littler sisters.  So we had to keep looking.

This tree was bent sideways, so we got some interesting photos pushing and pulling it to the ground.

Finally, after much debate and deliberation, we found the perfect tree.

Oh yes, no Christmas tree search with my family is complete without numerous cups of hot chocolate.

Finally victorious, we carry the tree towards the trailer.

And sit in regal state with the tree.

Once we arrived home (and waited several hours), my father drilled a hole in the base and helped hammer the tree stand into place.

The next job is the lights.  I’m in charge of hanging the lights, which went rather smoothly this year with much help from my sisters.  After the lights are up, all of us hang our ornaments upon our own sections of the tree.

The ornaments are new and old, reflecting the changes and traditions over the years.

And finally, once all the ornaments are hung, the floor rugs are laid and the presents placed beneath the tree.  The finished Christmas tree is a truly beautiful sight to see.  As I gaze at the shimmering ornaments and shining lights, I reflect on the joy of Christmas and the wonderful blessings and memories I have received and created over the years.  As we enter this final week of Advent, I wish you all a blessed octave before Christmas and a Merry Christmas!

Hard Work is Sensible

When you were growing up, did your mother do all the work around the house?  Or did you have to pick up your toys?  Or clean your room?  Or sweep the floors?  Or help with the dishes?  Most likely you had some type of chores, especially as you got older and your number of siblings increased.  Now that you have kids of your own, do you make them do chores?  Or do you do everything for them so that they don't have to work?  Regardless of whether you homeschool or send your children away to school, chores are an important aspect of growing up that should never be dispensed with for several reasons.

1.  Chores build the family.  When a child has specific jobs to help out around the house, that child is contributing to the family unit.  A family that works together, builds together.  If the mother is stuck doing all of the housework and laundry etc., chances are that she will either develop a very short temper or she will have no time whatsoever to spend with her children (both of which are terrible options.)  While the children may not believe this at the time, chores help give them both a sense of accomplishment and of belonging to the family.  Because they are given responsibility, they have a keener sense of duty to the family.  As they grow older, they will (hopefully) realize a) how much a clean house makes everything run smoother and b) how much they enjoy a job well done.

2.  Chores build character.  If your children grow up being either waited on hand and foot or without responsibility, they will develop a character of "everything hard will be done for me."  By giving them chores and specific obligations young, you can train your children that a) hard work is a good and necessary thing and b) develop a sense of responsibility in their lives.  With chores comes a type of discipline in their daily and weekly routines that they can carry throughout their lives.

3.  Chores are a life-long tool.  Unless they marry extremely wealthy or make a boatload of money themselves and can, therefore, afford a housekeeper or a cleaning lady, a child who grows up without learning basic housecleaning etc. will be at a loss when they have their own household.  Every child should know the basics of how to properly clean a room, especially the kitchen and the bathroom.  These are basic, everyday skills that they will use throughout their lives.  They will help them pass their dorm inspections.  They could very well help fund their college education.  They will make their future homes so much easier to deal with.  

Growing up, I had several chores.  My first chore at the age of two was scrubbing the marker off the walls after I drew on the paper and the walls.  My second chore was helping put my toys in a paper bag to put away for a very long time because I wouldn't pick them up by myself.  My third chore was babysitting my younger siblings so that my pregnant mother could take a nap.  Filtered in between these more unique jobs, I had to sweep, do the dishes, help with the laundry, clean my room, etc.  Of course, I didn't have all of these to do at the same time until I got much older, but they were implemented nevertheless.  As my sisters and I grew up, the major chores were rotated.  One of us did dishes.  One of us cleaned bathrooms.  One of us helped with the laundry.  One of us swept and vacuumed.  This way we were neither overwhelmed nor underworked.  And all of us have learned or are learning how to properly care for a household.


To be continued . . . 

Just A Note

As you all know, the Christmas season is almost upon us.  I am delighted to be home with my family for the holiday, so my posts may be sporadic (or non-existent.)  Do not despair!  I will do my best to post a few times over the next two weeks.  In the meantime, I hope the remainder of your Advent season is blessed.  Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

I'll Be An Old Maid

No young girl wants to be labeled an "old maid."  Perhaps that's why we have become so desperate to have a man in our lives, regardless of whether he is "the one."  I have to admit that I was in the boat with all the other optimistic, naive young women who entered college with the thought "I'll be getting married when I graduate."  That wasn't in God's plan for me, at least not yet.  It's been a long road, and a difficult one, but I'm at last beginning to be content with my singlehood (even rejoicing in it occasionally.)  I'd like to take a few moments to pass on my experience and thoughts on the subject to all you readers out there who may be going through this or know somebody going through it.  Plus, teaching your girls what I'm about to write can save a lot of heartache.  Not all of it, but a great deal of it.


I've decided that there are a few steps to be taken when one looks at one's future, especially regarding the vocation of marriage.  I would like to outline them for you in the hope that together we can determine some of the cause behind womankind's inevitable tendency towards romantic illusions and heartbreak.

Step 1:  Discerning your vocation.  This does not mean figuring out where you want to work after graduation.  A vocation is your life's work, your calling, what God intended you for.  The most common distinction within vocations is that between the religious life and the married life, both of which are amazing vocations.  But your vocation could also be to the single life.  The process of discernment can take many years, even decades, and it won't work unless you are completely open to every possibility.  Too many people (myself included) spend their lives searching for something to complete them, but they search on their own and refuse to let God take control and show them their path.  It is a scary thing to offer all your hopes and dreams to God and place all your trust in Him.  And it's incredibly difficult, but once you do, everything will fall into place as He reveals His wondrous plans for your life.  

Step 2:  Where to look?  For the sake of this post, I'm going to focus on those who are called to the married life.  I currently believe that is my vocation, although I'm still working at the complete discernment.  In the meantime, what should you do?  Suppose you don't have a boyfriend (or any possible prospects).  Does this mean that you will end an old maid?  NO!  As a dear friend recently said, "If you're not ready, and he is, God won't bring you together.  If you're ready, and he is not, God won't bring you together.  Only when God knows you are both ready will you be brought together."  While you are single, your sole purpose is to draw closer to God and develop your own spiritual life.  The vocation of all people is to strive for sainthood.  As a single person, you have advantages that married people do not.  You can spend more time in prayer and meditation than a mother with seven children or a working father.  Use this time to become the best person you can be.  For in order to give yourself to someone else completely, you must first know who you are.  And that is no easy task.

Step 3:  Don't despair!  Too many young women fall into the depths of despair when they aren't married by age 23.  Believe me, I was in that boat once too.  It seems that everyone around you is happily in love, and you are left out in the cold.  What is it that those girls have that you don't?  Are you ugly?  Boring?  Unlovable?  I've asked myself all these questions at one time or other, but thankfully with the help of God and my closest friends, I have determined that the answer to all those questions is an emphatic NO.  Just because you don't have someone yet, doesn't mean that you won't in the future.  Focusing on what we don't have causes us to lose sight of all that we do possess.  If you spend too much time daydreaming about Mr. Right, you will miss spectacular opportunities in your daily life.  He'll come when he's supposed to (or near enough).  Don't spend your life wishing upon a fairy tale.  

Step 4:  Stop looking.  I'm sure you've all had the trouble of something bordering on a pathological search for a guy.  Or close enough.  The checking of left hands for rings.  The glances to see if he's got a girlfriend with him.  The subconscious appraisal of his potential.  All of this simply works negatively.  A) You're automatically classifying every guy you see, making snap judgments.  B) You set yourself up for heartache because inevitably all of the guys are taken or whatever.  You have to stop thinking "Is he the one?" every time you see a guy.  And this goes double when you make friends with a guy.  There is nothing worse than analyzing a new acquaintance for his marriageable potential.  Treat him as a friend, nothing more and nothing less.  If something is meant to happen, let it blossom out of the friendship.  Don't try to force love to grow in a hothouse rather than using the clean air of nature.  If you can stop thinking about every guy as a potential boyfriend, and instead think of them just as potential friends, your life (and your heart) will be a lot easier.  

Step 5:  Guard your heart.  Don't leap at the first opportunity just because you've been waiting for so long.  Don't allow yourself to enter a relationship which is detrimental to your health, whether it be your spiritual, your physical, your emotional, or your mental health.  We've all seen the movies with love at first sight, but I've come to believe that such a thing does not exist.  Not true love anyways.  Like at first sight I can do.  But true love must come from a deep understanding of the other person, which understanding only comes about through true friendship.  By staying away from bad relationships, you protect your heart for your future spouse.  I was once told that every time you break up with someone, your heart rips in two.  If you go through relationship after relationship, by the time you finally find your spouse, your heart is missing large portions.  Be cautious (but not afraid).  Love is about taking chances and risking everything, but generally when a person takes life-changing chances, they weigh a few of the potential pros and cons.  Don't let your passion drown out your reason.  Passion and reason should work harmoniously together.  Believe me, your heart will thank you in the long run if you let reason take the precedence.

I could go on, but I believe that these are the most important things to remember.  Above all, do not lose hope.  God has a calling for everyone, and if your vocation is marriage, He will not let you die without fulfilling it.  Keep your mind and heart open to His will.  Strive towards sainthood.  Keep your eyes open to the world around you.  Cherish and care for your friendships.  And eventually, probably when you least expect it, you'll find that the love of your life has appeared before you, creeping on soft and slow through the guise of friendship blossoming to true love.